xfs: move more delwri setup into xfs_buf_delwri_queue

Do not transfer a reference held by the caller to the buffer on the list,
or decrement it in xfs_buf_delwri_queue, but instead grab a new reference
if needed, and let the caller drop its own reference.  Also move setting
of the XBF_DELWRI and XBF_ASYNC flags into xfs_buf_delwri_queue, and
only do it if needed.  Note that for now xfs_buf_unlock already has
XBF_DELWRI, but that will change in the following patches.

Signed-off-by: Christoph Hellwig <hch@lst.de>
Reviewed-by: Dave Chinner <dchinner@redhat.com>
Signed-off-by: Alex Elder <aelder@sgi.com>