[XFRM]: Fix aevent related crash

When xfrm_user isn't loaded xfrm_nl is NULL, which makes IPsec crash because
xfrm_aevent_is_on passes the NULL pointer to netlink_has_listeners as socket.
A second problem is that the xfrm_nl pointer is not cleared when the socket
is releases at module unload time.

Protect references of xfrm_nl from outside of xfrm_user by RCU, check
that the socket is present in xfrm_aevent_is_on and set it to NULL
when unloading xfrm_user.

Signed-off-by: Patrick McHardy <kaber@trash.net>
Signed-off-by: David S. Miller <davem@davemloft.net>