nvme-rdma: Fix device removal handling

Device removal sequence may have crashed because the
controller (and admin queue space) was freed before
we destroyed the admin queue resources. Thus we
want to destroy the admin queue and only then queue
controller deletion and wait for it to complete.

More specifically we:
1. own the controller deletion (make sure we are not
   competing with another deletion).
2. get rid of inflight reconnects if exists (which
   also destroy and create queues).
3. destroy the queue.
4. safely queue controller deletion (and wait for it
   to complete).

Reported-by: Steve Wise <swise@opengridcomputing.com>
Signed-off-by: Sagi Grimberg <sagi@grimberg.me>
Reviewed-by: Christoph Hellwig <hch@lst.de>